Time is not on my side

So here it is - the first day of National Blog Posting Month (NaBloPoMo). I'm committed to writing something on my blog every day for the month of August. It's a goal I have set for myself. Writing for me can be slow and painful so I'm concerned that I won't be able to produce something for 31 consecutive days. And, oh, have I mentioned that I'm short on focus and self discipline? My hope is that in the interest of posting every day, my writing will loosen up because I won't have time to agonize over every word and phrase. Knowing that the NaBloPoMo folks are monitoring participants to verify we complete the task will boost my focus and scare me into a better disciplined approach.

So having had plenty of time to prepare and anxious to get off on the right foot, how is day one going? Let me see. So far I've written in my journal, enjoyed a long lunch with GB, watched Stardust, a movie Bill gave us. When at last I get around to writing, what happens? Storms have knocked out U-Verse, which powers our internet. I panic. Oh my god, what if I can't access the internet and I miss the first day of NaBloPoMo?! I should have done it this morning, but thought I had all day to get it done -- plenty of time to do it later I told myself.

I live, I swear, in a time warp. Time mocks me. I think I have time to do "this,"with plenty of time left to get "that" done as well. I'm looking at the hours of the day stretched out before me, disappearing into the distant hazy horizon, when without warning, time snaps, smacks me hard on the back of the head, throwing me facedown into a huge pile of unfinished, and by this time unfinishable, business. Time is up! And what do I do? Brushing myself off while I wait for the ringing in my ears to stop, and with an optimism far greater than evidence supports, I smile to myself: I'll do better tomorrow.